Sunday, September 26, 2010

Missing the point

I don't pick these apart just to be nasty; I have lots of ways to amuse myself. But online dating can be frustrating and it kind of helps to vent about it on my blog. Also, I harbor a tiny hope that someone might read one of these and maybe get something out of it - a way to respond constructively or, if they recognize similarly oblivious behavior in themself, stop doing it.

So today I logged into OKC for the first time in over a month and I'm trying to get caught up on my messages. Here's one that drives me crazy - I've received a variation of this from many people. My comments are interspersed parenthetically in the pasted quoted text.

"that you have a fantasy about filling out a list of things and magically a prefect match will appear is so true! Thanks for putting it into perspective. (How did I put 'it' into perspective? What?)

I do like what you say about yourself. Good job for that... it isn't easy is it? (I spent 15 minutes writing my profile.)

I know you aren't looking for someone my age, but that doesn't mean we can't talk does it? (Yes, that's what that means, it exactly means that I DO NOT WANT emails from men in their 50s. Oh but, you REALLY want to talk to me? And that should count more than what I want? Fun!.)

I like your mind and I'd like to visit with you from time to time. (Like Santa?) I like making new friends and learning new perspectives. Maybe you'll read my profile and find it interesting enough to send me a note. (No.) That would be nice. (Still no.)

Thanks for coming back and saying what you did. It matters to me. (What? Are you drunk already?)

Best Regards"
But really - I explicitly say in my profile what age range I want, and my first paragraph was about how I fantasize about making a list of what I want and getting exactly this guy reads that, sympathizes with the sentiment, and then says to himself 'I'm exactly the opposite of what she says she wants, and she also says she wants exactly what's on her list, I SHOULD TOTALLY EMAIL HER AND OFFER TO COME VISIT.' What does that even mean? He lives in the same urban area I do.
Also...why is someone emotionally touched by a complete stranger's dating profile? Is this a thing?

1 comment:

  1. I think nearly every woman on OKC has gotten these types of men. It still never fails to truly fuckin boggle me. The audacity! The sheer stupidity!

    And sadly, stupid can't be fixed, so telling them off in spectacular fashion might feel good, but they won't get it, and we become the raving lunatic.