Friday, August 20, 2010

Dating through your ages

So, I'm still dating. I'm in my mid-30s and I've never found anyone I felt like I could put up with for long enough to want to marry (at least not anyone I was also willing to also have sex with). As you get older (not old, older, as in older than you used to be which is totally normal and happens to all of us) things change. You don't think the same way about dating unless you are a perpetual child and refuse to evolve/mature/grow the fuck up. If you are, I'm sorry, and please recognize that while growth and change are hard they are super worth it and sometimes come with prizes and/or cake.

Here are some handy illustrations of what dating is like when you are:

(I greyed out the important bits so this is SFW)

Hormones, amirite? I was a bit friskier than the average bear. Haha.

The uncertainty and mutual insecurity is half the fun.

You have very little interest in wasting time, and you realize by now that 99% of guys (if you are a hetero female) are clearly not a good match. You are able to rapidly weed them out and, every time you ignore your own instints, something goes horribly wrong. You realize that it's more important to worry about whether or not you like them than to waste time worrying if they like you. You force yourself to do it even though you don't want to because staying home with your cat, video games, and snack food of choice is so seductively appealing that you realize you are getting into a spiral that will end with you never ever leaving the house. Which, while it is a perfectly valid life choice, doesn't sound like the most fulfilling way to spend the next 40 or so years. I feel like I somehow got off track here at the end? The whole 'I'm going to die a hermit' thing may just be me.


  1. You are too awesome to die alone, so I'm sure your Mr. Fuck-You-Awesomely-All-Night-Long-And-Still-Be-Able-To-Have-An-Intelligent-Conversation-The-Next-Day will come along soon.
    But if, for some crazy reason, that doesn't happen, there are two things that'll always be with you: Me and sex toys! :)

  2. Aww thank you! I love both you AND SEX TOYS! XOXO